We've come a long way

We were discussing issues in the Middle East. “One problem,” said Tim, “is that the populations there are largely ignorant and don’t understand each other’s religion.” That would be, as opposed to us?

I recall being astounded by someone I met in college who had graduated with honors from a parochial school in Cincinnati. It was the time of the Six Day War. He opined that of course Jews would side with Israel. They’re all from there.

What? Where did they come from for the 50 or so centuries prior to the founding of Israel? I asked him if his entire family came from Rome (he had a German surname). His face went blank and said it was a stupid question. Catholics come from all over. I take no comfort in knowing he’s now highly placed in the administration of his alma mater.

Of course, that took place a long time ago. Last week, the doorbell rang. Outside of Girl Scout Cookie season, this is a rare occurrence. There were two young men in white shirts and black ties. Uh oh. They were wearing name tags indicating they were with a church headquartered in Utah. Yeah, I’m a good candidate for that.

The alpha dog asked me if I was devoutly religious. Let’s see, which answer would be most discouraging? I decided that a zealot would not appear to be a good prospect. “Yes, very much so.” The sound you hear is commandments breaking.

“And what church do you attend?”

The catcher is signaling for a curve ball. “Synagogue.”

“I’m not familiar with that. What branch of Christianity would that be?”

“That would be Judaism.”

“I’ve heard of it.” Heard of it? It predates your religion by over 5,500 years. I wondered if book, newspaper or similar noun would ring a bell with him. “I’m always interested in learning about other religions.” Apparently not. “Could you relate its theology to me?”

Right here, while we’re standing on a doorstep with 96-degree air temperature? “Think Old Testament.”

“Then you believe in the (didn’t catch this first word) of Moses.”

“He got a lot of ink.”

“Pardon?”

“Moses had a starring role in the Old Testament. Parting the Red Sea, Mount Sinai, burning bush; a lot of the major scenes.”

“Your congregation no longer practices sacrifices or do they?”

I hadn’t noticed any the last time I drove through Amberley Village. “No, we haven’t had a good one in years.”

“And what is your perception of Jesus Christ?”

“Nice Jewish boy. Good with woodworking but could’ve been more selective with his friends.”

“Could we come in and discuss our belief with you?”

“Not a good time. I have a goat staked out in the backyard.”

We’ve come a long way in forty years.