The List

I ran into Joanne at my high school reunion this past year. She was teaching psychology at a southern university and was about to retire. She said she would be glad to get away from the pressure cooker of academia. I choked on my scotch at that, which didn’t go over with her real well.

A few days ago, I received a thick letter with her return address on it. It contained a questionnaire and a cover letter that explained she had grown restless in retirement and decided to do a research project. She hoped her old classmates would cooperate.

I read the questionnaire and called her. We did a little catching up before I asked her about the study and why she was using our old class instead of a random test group. Joanne said that something struck her while mingling with the people over that weekend of the reunion. She had it by the tail and just needed to pull it out of the hole. Joanne’s been living in the south too long.

“So, you want to find out why some of us made it and some didn’t.”

There was a pregnant pause. “Why do you say that?”

“Looks like a reverse engineered outline of Harris’ book.”

Another pause. “Is it that obvious? I must be rusty.”

“I wouldn’t worry about it. I used to borrow from the book as a basis of screening potential employees, so that’s probably why it jumped out at me.”

Sydney J. Harris was an extraordinarily keen observer of human nature. If you haven’t read his books or columns, it’s likely you’ve seen a “Winners & Losers” list on some poster, plaque or calendar.

My thinking was that there was a bell shaped curve on which we all fall, with the extremes being pure winners and pure losers (of which there are probably none). Most people are a mixture. It’s the ratio of that mixture that determines your outcomes and determines your place on the curve. In the context of hiring, people on the high side of the curve would produce results and progress, and make money for you. Losers are a cancer to the organization and their negative behavior will undermine its growth. Winners emphasize creating while losers constantly engage in destructive activity.

If you went into the Harris book thinking it simplistically pegged winners as star sports players, wealthy industrialists or other cliché, you were pleasantly surprised. He had much more insight and depth than to settle for that. For instance, you could be a very skillful info tech executive, which would seem to tag you as a winner. But, if you have a malicious side that controls your behavior, and you use your talent to spread a computer virus, you’re definitely a loser. On the other hand, you could easily be in a much less “prestigious” position, and be an accomplished winner.

I didn’t employ all of his points in my interviewing profiling, and borrowed from Bob Hurley and others. But, you may have seen the posters, etc. and recognize something from this list:

When a Winner makes a mistake, he says, “I was wrong.” When a Loser makes a mistake, he says, “It wasn’t my fault.”

The Winner learns from his mistakes, the Loser repeats them.

The Winner makes his point and stops talking. The Loser argues and beats things to death.

The Winner is always part of the solution. The Loser is always part of the problem.

A Winner makes use of criticism. A Loser angrily denies it, often seeing it where it doesn’t even exist.

A Loser believes in Fate. A Winner believes we make our Fate by what we do or fail to do.

The Winner always has a solution or result. The Loser always has an excuse.

A Winner in the end gives more than he takes. A Loser dies clinging to the illusion that winning means taking more than you give.

A Winner lives in the present and has his eyes on better things for the future. A Loser is a prisoner of the past and wallows in old failures, grudges and problems.

A Winner revels in the success and accomplishments of others. A Loser detests them, taking the perverse view that they reflect his own failures.

The Winner says “I must do something.” The Loser says “Something must be done.”

The Winner sees an answer for every problem. The Loser sees a problem for every answer.

The Winner is part of the team. The Loser is apart from the team.

A Winner knows who and what he is and acts and feels accordingly. A Loser depends upon the perceptions of others, and his moods and behaviors are dictated by them.

A Winner has control of himself, and will use that to improve, grow and accomplish. A Loser is a Loser, and therefore has little choice but to act like one in negative ways.

The Winner is like a thermostat. The Loser is like a thermometer.

A Winner sees things as how they relate to the big picture. A Loser sees that everything is about him.

The Winner stands firm on values, but compromises on petty things. The Loser stands firm on petty things, but compromises on values.

The Winner focuses on what is happening or being accomplished. A Loser concerns himself with what others think of him.

The Winner sees reality and successfully navigates it. The Loser fabricates his own reality and is out of step with others.

The Winner interacts with other Winners who leverage the positives. The Loser flocks with other Losers who perpetuate their negative behavior and outcomes.

The Winner enjoys and loves. The Loser broods and hates.

The Winner sees the gain. The Loser sees the pain.

A Winner works and accomplishes with other people. A Loser is constantly in conflict and achieves little.

A Winner speaks of ideas, goals, achievements and events. A Loser talks about people.

The Winner takes action and achieves much. The Loser wishes and accomplishes little.