Life Decisions

Along life’s path, we make critical decisions. You may never be sure if they were correct, so it’s nice to have affirmations when you can get them. I’ve had a couple recently, but under distressing circumstances.

I am “retired” but take on projects I enjoy (mostly marketing and PR) because that’s like sport to me. A recent assignment requires a purchase in behalf of a client. I’m getting bids from the client’s current vendors, but adding a couple who might offer better service or pricing.

One of those is Jack’s company. I know him from years ago when we were in the same CEO roundtable. That’s a program where you meet regularly with a group other company owners or chief executives and serve as an ersatz board for each other. Actually, it’s better than a board where the directors often rubber-stamp executive decisions and management spoon feeds information to them. We were candid and held each other’s feet to the fire.

Jack is a great guy and a hard working salesman. But, he shouldn’t have been running a company. He let his employees walk all over him. He would come to meetings with horror stories about what this one of that one pulled in the past couple weeks. We’d get all over him about issuing warnings or getting rid of the deadwood, which he would vow to do. But, he never did.

His customers also abused him and he lost money on that end. But, he worked so hard and the economy was good, so he was raking it in. He was living the good life with a huge house in the best neighborhood and all the trimmings. He didn’t feel compelled to pull in the reins on people, assuming that was even in him to do so. I didn’t think it was and advised him to cash in while he was on top.

Instead of calling or emailing, I thought I’d just show up and surprise him. I was the one to be surprised. There was no signage on his building. I could see lights inside, so I went in. A few people were crating stuff up.

I found Jack in his office and we exchanged jubilant greetings. Then, we got down to brass tacks. “What the hell is going on?”

He was merging with another company because things had been going badly the past years. Under those circumstances, you usually don’t “merge.” You’re getting acquired at fire sale pricing. Employees had been making more and more demands, even though the business hadn’t been going well, and he had been tapping his own assets to keep the company afloat.

So, along came this merger opportunity and he took it. All of his equipment and inventory would be moved over there and he would do sales. Yep, he was being acquired.

He downsized his housing and lifestyle and would probably have to work the rest of his years to dig out and maintain a semblance of the good life. He looked at me. “Why aren’t you working?”

I could be banking more bucks by starting a business or working at something that doesn’t ring my bell. But, I don’t think there’s a good exchange rate for enjoyable days, which are finite in our lifetime, vs. cash. I’ve avoided the big/multiple houses, status symbol cars, etc. for that reason. You don’t own them, they own you. You work for them.

If I’m punching a clock, I lose two thirds of a year. Or, every year I spend now doing what makes me happy is worth three in the harness. In ten years, I’d lose seven of satisfaction. And, there’s a time value. That is, my present health and physical condition enable me to enjoy life more than I probably can a decade from now.

I assume he asked the question because I used to live a life similar to his, except with more expensive toys than status symbols. But, at one point, I decided how I wanted to play out the end game and restructured my life to accomplish that. Seeing Jack still in the harness while his grandchildren are starting college reaffirms my decisions.


Mark is a member of a literary dinner club (for lack of a better term) I belong to. For decades, he’s built up his professional practice. On several occasions, he’s expressed anticipation of getting out and enjoying life. “Why not now?” I’d respond.

“In a few years,” he’d say, “I want to have a big pile of money when I pull the plug, so I can really enjoy my final years.” He’s said that for as long as I’ve known him, but recently he seemed to mean it.

Last night, I received an email from the head of the group. Mark has suffered a massive heart attack and was in an ICU. No brain activity. He spent more time than I did piling up money, but my decision is looking better.


Yeah, it’s good to have affirmation of your decisions. But, not at other people’s expense.